Many of us learn the hard way in life today, especially due to not listening very well to those around us.  I’ve found that we narrow or filter what we want to listen to from people, tv, radio, and even what we retain when reading.  Studies show stats that say we only remember 30% of what was said, and read.  That’s a pretty low stat.

Growing up we experience firsthand what it means to not be paying attention or to only recall certain aspects of a conversation or what we watched and read.  As children, we hear, “Clean your room, Do your chores, Have your homework done by 7pm, or be home on time.”  But we can easily remember coming home late, not doing our chores, or always having our room a mess.  Have you ever thought about why that is.  Let me propose a reason.

Our listening skills are as good as we subconsciously give credit and attention to them.  For example, as a child we learn that we can chose what we listen to and do each day, but with that there are consequences with our decisions.  When talked to or told what to do, we selectively remember what we want.  So for the child, in their mind they do hear what was said, but they don’t remember it due to their attention being on other things, activities that are more fun or inside their box of attention.

The same principle applies to us as adults.  Even though we won’t admit it our listening skills are very similar to those of a child.  We still are selective on what we listen to, but it’s even worse to what we retain or care to respond too.  As adults we aren’t disciplined or watched over as stringently as we were as children.  So our attention to consequences for our decision is lessened, which leads to less interest in paying attention to those communicating to us.

Now don’t get me wrong here, I’m not saying all adults are poor listeners, but generally speaking, we do listen and respond more selectively than we did as children.  Plus we are more hesitant to share our feelings and thoughts on the things that impact us daily.

It’s the individuals how eagerly aim to be a good listener who end up being more successful and happy in life.  There isn’t much data to support that statement beyond my own personal experience.  And most of those who do have good listening skills are the ones who have learned that hard way that not having them can lead to a less fulfilled lifestyle.

So one thought to close, is to sit back for a second and listen to everything around you.  What do you hear?  What do you feel?  What do you taste and smell in the air?  Doing these types of activities can be very rewarding.

To Your Success!

More and more individuals are becoming aware of the power in vision boards.  Have you ever used a vision board in your life?  It’s a great tool to focus your attention and emotion towards achieving something new in your life.  A vision board is a collection of pictures, words, and other images that display you having accomplished a goal.

For example, here’s a personal story of how I used a vision board, and related techniques to get a new car.  I’d been wanting a new BMW, one of their racing models.  My original goal was to get a BMW M5, a car worth over $100,000.  At the time, I only made a modest income and had no plan or idea of how I could earn more money to purchase the pricey of a car.

What I did have though was a vision.  I knew what I wanted down to the tiniest detail.  I had picked all of the colors, options, and accessories.  During this time I was introduced to the concept of using a vision board to help me get the car.

So I bought a corkboard and found a bunch of pictures of the car or people having fun driving the car I wanted.  I posted them on the corkboard and put the corkboard near my computer so that I could look at it each day.

What I started to find after posting the vision board is that I began to generate more emotion and feeling towards having the car.  I think this caused something internally to shift within me, because I started receiving ideas and inspiration to what I could do to make more money and get the car.

I started doing building more websites and advertising them online.  Shortly thereafter a new income source was created and money was coming in.  It still wasn’t enough to afford a $1100 car payment, but it did create more faith within about my abilities to accomplish something big.

It soon became a habit to stare at the vision board.  It just felt good to stare at the pictures and day dream about driving fast in a very nice sports car.  I think this is what really made things start to happened.  It was the generation of feelings and emotions of having the car in the present moment.  The more I did this the closer I felt the car coming to me, or being able to buy it.

Long story short, I did end up getting a brand new 2009 BMW.  It actually ended up being a different model that I could afford.  The best part is that the car I have now is even more tailored to what I wanted versus buying the super expensive one.  I’m just as happy and actually feel the same way I did as when I was day dreaming about it.  The vision board worked and I recommend using one to all of you.

To Your Success!

Being at work can be very stressful for many employees, especially lately with the global economy being a huge factor in the growth or shrinking of businesses around the world.  With the media only displaying the negative economy news, and will layoffs happening daily, the normal day to day stress of work is intensified with fears of not having a job.

Having worked in multiple internet companies, which come and go like the wind, I’ve experienced my fair share of seeing layoffs in action.  Fortunately, I’ve never been affected by it without a big advance notice, like 3 months, but I can still relate to the worry about having a job from day to day.

So what can we do, those of us who still depend on a paycheck to survive, which is most of us these days, an not be worried about making ends meet or about having a job each day?  Well the first step is to recognize that there are many things outside of our control and subsequent circle of concern.  Many times we feel that to have peace of mind, we have to put our mind to work to solve all potential outcomes that could happen to us each day.

The problem with this strategy is that our minds are very good at worrying and creating problems that will never exist, but for some reason we feel afraid of so many things outside of our control.

Have you ever thought about the following?

What if I get sick when I’m on vacation?  Who says you’re going to get sick?  Just your mind which is making you remember historical experiences in which you got sick and subsequently programmed your mind to be on the lookout so that you never get sick again.

Or how about the fear of not meeting your employers expectations at work?  Most of us struggle with this, but what’s funny is we actually tell ourselves that we are not good enough in almost all areas of life.  We’re too fat, too broke, too unhappy, too lazy…  We say these things to ourselves and naturally end up living that way.  So how about the next time you think you’re not meeting your employer’s expectations, say to yourself, wait a second, this isn’t true, I’m actually doing a great job and am expecting a pay raise soon.  Saying this will make you feel good!

What I’m trying to say is that we need to focus our attention on those areas of life that we really can control, and the first step is to control what is happening in your mind.  If you can do that then you’ll soon see change, beneficial change taking place in your life.

Here’s some partnered information and resources for your benefit.

Having friends is one of the greatest joys in life.  Being able to connect with them on personal matters and hear their advice is one of my foundations in life.  I have a very close friend who I talk to at least 2-3 times a week.  We live in different states, so we are only able to visit when I head down to San Diego (my hometown) for a weekend.

Anyways, last night we were chatting about our life goals.  One of mine is to settle in Hawaii and have a ranch in front of epic surf.  (I grew up bodyboarding, and Hawaii was always a special vacation for me.)

While talking with my friend, I mentioned that my plan (currently) is the first move to San Diego and get back in to shape with my surfing and then a year or two later move to Hawaii.  I was then challenged to skip that step and go straight to Hawaii.  Why waste time, my buddy said.

His point of view was something that I hadn’t considered before.  After he said this, I was a little startled and immediately wanted to reply with fear-based comments, like “I haven’t been to Hawaii in 10 years,” or “I don’t know what to do next,” but instead I just said to myself, “Wow, he’s right.”

So last night I couldn’t sleep, because of the challenge/opportunity that was now before me.  Why waste time in California when your end goal is Hawaii.  This morning my whole mind set and focus is completely different.  I feel that sense of adventure and excitement as I now have a change in plans, and my excitement level is higher than ever before.

My point in this post is that it’s extremely important to be open to others viewpoints and ideas, because many times they carry a message that you need to hear.  And being stretched to do greater things because of the influence of trusted friends can be a very rewarding process.

So listen more to people and be willing to accept advice.  It could change your entire life.

I’ll keep you posted on my adventure to move to Hawaii.  There’s still a lot that needs to be done first, like be financially free, and self employed.

To your success!

So there’s a lot of talk out there today about Government takeover of everything from Healthcare to forced vaccinations for Swine Flu.  Since these types of discussions influence our daily lives, I thought I would post my own thoughts on the matter.

The major news outlets are eager to show the latest information regarding the world we live in.  Additionally, the two main political parties in the United States (Democrats and Republicans) also are eager to control power within the government.  As such there is always competition for your attention and decisions.

Throughout life there will always be new levels of topics that cause emotions within us, most often the emotion of fear.  Fear of loss, fear of lack, fear of death, fear of failure, fear of bondage and more.  We can all relate.  Many times this fear creates some sort of action within us and it’s usually action that we don’t enjoy doing, like arguing and fighting.

Unfortunately, the only response to arguing and fighting is the exact same but intensified.  We are easily willing to stand up for ourselves, which is very important.  But how do we stand up for ourselves without bringing more negativity back at us?  Or in other words how live the lives we want with the fear-based information and communication that fills our days?

The answer is to move forward with your dreams and goals no matter what others say is going to happen.  The successful in this world have learned how to accomplish their goals even though the world around them appears to be in chaos.

I love reading stories of kids who grew up in war torn, poverty ridden countries who end up becoming powerful, influential leaders in the world.  Being surrounded by family and friends who have little hope, plus a community that only knows sorrow, it can be an impossible task to create a life full of love and growth.

The secret to it all is being able to accept the surroundings, every piece of it, even including the despicable and unsightly.  As such, it frees up a lot of thoughts and energy that is wasted on worrying about things outside of your control, and allowing that internal power to be focused on what you want to achieve.

Imagine for a moment.  Say one thing that you really want to do in life.  For me it’s owning my own business and having the freedom and income to travel the world with my family.  Wow, just saying that creates a feeling of burden…   Only because it’s something new.

You will feel a lot of “resistance” towards accomplishing anything worthwhile.  The old statement that anything good never comes easy still applies today.

But those who really want it, are those who have the determination and passion to push through to the end.  To really think things through and let the present be as is.

So back to being bombarded with lots of fear-based communication and entertainment, if you want to you can arise above the fog of fear and take your life to a new level.  No need to waste thoughts and energy worrying about the future.  Instead let’s put all of our energy in to creating our dreams and benefiting the world in a positive manner!

To Your Success!

I took my car in to get the oil topped off today, in preparation for my trip to San Diego tomorrow.  I own a fast, little BMW 135i. I always enjoy visiting my local BMW dealership.  It’s the same location where I bought the car last November, so I’ve built some good connections there.

My sales rep, whose name is Collin, is a great example of one who trusts his instincts and doesn’t act out of fear.  We had the opportunity to chat today while my car was being serviced.  I’m an avid BMW and European sports car fan, so I love hearing the latest news about new cars about to come to market.

I asked Collin if there was any news about the new BMW M5 to be released in the next couple of years.  He mentioned that the car would be a twin turbo charged V8, pushing out 550 horsepower and capable of doing 0-60 in 3.8 seconds.  Very impressive numbers!

Not to make this post about cars (which I easily could do), I want to share the other part of our discussion, that of Collin’s experience selling high-end cars during an economy that is struggling here in the United States.  As all of you are aware, being car salesmen is a very tough job, especially if the whole industry is at a standstill.  Now it may be a little different selling products that only wealthier customers can purchase, but the economics still apply.

Collin lives a life of trust, and peace of mind in the outcome he wants to create at work.  I experienced this first hand during my own sales experience while purchasing my car.  Most sales reps are very eager and pushing to close the deal really fast.  They call you a few times a day hoping to close the deal right then and there.  Collin’s approach is completely different.  He waits for you to show genuine interest in a car and then from there only casually follows up with his potential customers.  There is never more than one call he makes without receiving a return call from the customer.  Other car salesmen will keep calling you for weeks on end trying to get a sale out of you.

The interesting piece is that Collin actually sells more cars than most people.  When I talked to him today, I asked how business was, he smiled and said, “Good!”  He knows that he will be successful no matter what the external circumstances are around him.

I can relate to enjoying success when it appears there isn’t much to be successful for.  It’s all our mind set about our circumstances.  If you are naturally positive thinking, than you will be more motivated to create solutions for all the challenges you face.  This is the secret to making wealth, and how the greatest fortunes have been made.  Did you know that the wealthiest Americans began their fortunes during weak economic times?

This is my first blog post.  I’d like to add a personal approach to Attracted Actions.   I’ll be writing about fear versus love in my own life with the hope that it benefits you, the reader.

Today I traveled for business to LA.  I was part of some negotiations with a large internet company.  It was very interesting to hear some of the talk from the company we were visiting.  Not only were there a few comments made by the CEO about being a little “shady” with the type of value he would provide his customers, but he also presented a strong confidence in his ability to achieve his corporate vision.

The impression he left on me was one of intrigue and let-down.  It reminded me that there are very bright, successful people each day who do things that take advantage of others.  I’m not saying this CEO is a bad person, as he actually provided much value in with his other products.  The only thing is that the image I remember of him is one discredit.

It’s interesting how we remember negative things more than positive ones.  We’ve been raised in a world where we look more at the negative or weak aspects of a human being instead of the good in them.  (I’m very guilty of this.)  We do this as a defence to others doing the same to us. It’s all like a mental/emotional mind war we play with everyone we come in contact with.  If we are better than another, we can be a peace within ourselves. Unfortunately, this process really only creates worry and fear, instead of love.

So to be fair, and to start a positive habit of recognizing the good in others, I’d like to mention some qualities I admire in the CEO I visited today.  Like I mentioned above, he is a very bright, confident, proven individual who doesn’t accept the word “can’t.”  He has created many jobs for people and has made shareholders wealthy.  He is an influential leader who listens and takes into account the opinions of his employees.

There…  I feel better now.  They say that writing down your thoughts is not only a healing thing, but a transforming process.  Transforming from a limited view on ourselves and others to a loving, visionary view on the world is what we need more people to do these days.  It would affect so much within the world we live.